I was absolutely certain of what was in my heart, but not so
certain if it were just me in my own desire.
So I asked God “Why would you call ME Lord, to preach your righteous,
holy words of life giving salvation to others?”
I knew well, as did God, the sin in my life. Though I had repented, surely such a past as
mine disqualified me from the future dream my heart was forming even as I
rejected it as nonsense.
But I had vowed a vow, when that day of full surrender came
to my heart finally after years of stumbling and sinning and trying to “be good”
on my own. A simple yet powerful vow I
could do nothing else but keep. To obey
Him, the Lord, in all things as best I could, no matter the difficulty. And God was, as clearly as I could understand
it, calling me to take the necessary steps to obtain the validation of men He
had already freely anointed me for, to be a Minister of the Gospel. Every ordinance man had ordained was against
such an occurrence, yet the strength of conviction in my heart could not be
denied.
So I began a journey, difficult yet filled with joy in
obedience to the Call of my Heavenly Father.
Who would accept one such as I, divorced, bankrupt, a sinner with sin
that was very evident and impossible to hide.
To make it even more difficult, I
am female!
The Lord, so full of Love for His children, took me to an
earthly ministry known for its stringent regulations concerning Ministers,
particularly concerning women. I hid
nothing, kept nothing back, and even as all the rules of man said NO, God said
YES! Accepted into the Ministerial Program, I was credentialed in June
2006. Next, on to full Ordination. I was on track, with many powerful and
influential men and women speaking for me in this.
BUT GOD…. Have you ever noticed that when man says “But…” it
is usually something rather negative that follows? BUT GOD, when He steps in, He brings about
miracles. He overcomes the world, just
as He promised when He walked this earth as a man, and encouraged His
disciples, warning them that in this world there would be trials and
tribulations, but we should take heart, for He has overcome the world!
Years before, when I finally let go of my dreams and desires
and surrendered all to the Lord, broken, broke and divorced, in jest to my friends I declared I would never
marry again unless God Himself brought that man right to my front door! Then I put all that aside and began to walk
in the path my Lord was leading.
As I was moving forward in the hierarchy of the church,
Thanksgiving day 2007 there came a knock on my door. January 2008 I married for the last and only
TRUE time in my life. But man – man declared
this was “unrighteous” and removed all support for me as a Minister, even so
far as taking away those hard-earned credentials!
BUT GOD – who is the One who called and anointed me, brought
me to a place where GRACE was spoken, and once more His call as anointed Minister
was validated by man as I received full
Ordination as Minister of His precious Gospel.
All through I kept questioning, asking “Why would you call
ME Lord, to preach your righteous, holy words of life giving salvation to
others?” One day, the Lord spoke these words to my
heart, and I repeat them now to encourage others, broken Brothers and Sisters
who need to hear. I heard these quiet
questions in answer to my seeking.
“When you have an electrical problem, who do you call? An
electrician! When the plumbing isn’t
working, who do you call? A
plumber! When you want a picture drawn,
who do you call? An artist! When I want sinners to hear of my
forgiveness and grace – I call a sinner who has been forgiven.”
This is why Turn the Tide Ministries exists, why we travel
all over the USA , presenting our dramas and working with local churches. To bring life giving truth to sinners, that
it is the GRACE of God that will set them free and change their lives. He alone is the Healer of broker hearts! That no matter what the sin, there is
forgiveness and wholeness through Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior!
